Aftermath of Evangelion
by Neco Conneco
Summary: Shinji is finally out of the hospital, but the hallucinations haven't completely stopped. What could be causing them? And what of the first child? Where is Rei really at?
1. Reconcile

I do not own any characters or anything else from Evangelion. Everything is the sole property of Gainax. There, now that that's out of the way...  
  
Just so there's no confusion: 'Thinking silently' and "Speaking aloud"  
  
Due to popular demand (my friend Taxi Driver's advice) I decided to go back over this chapter and fix a couple things. I sort of rushed getting it on the site, and only revised it once. I hope this time I fixed most of what I shouldn't have done the first time.  
  
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"What a sick feeling"  
  
Was all he could say. He held her head in his lap. A tear dripped from his chin to her cheek. 'I just tried to kill the only person that I wanted to live,' He thought silently as he wiped the tear from her face. 'What kind of person am I? What kind of fool am I? What kind of monster am I?'  
  
Her eyes cracked open. She blinked twice, staring up at him. His eyes were closed tightly. Teardrops flowed from the corners of his eyes and collected under his chin. "Sh-Shinji?" She said weakly. He opened his eyes now, barely able to see.  
  
"Asuka!" he exclaimed. He pulled her up against him, supporting her weak body under her arms. She layed her head on his shoulder, her cheek nestled against his.   
  
"You're such an idiot." She whispered to him. He let a broad smile escape, knowing she could not see him. She felt his cheek tighten against her's, and smiled weakly herself.  
  
"I thought you were gone forever, Asuka." His voice trembled. He was still in shock from the giant Ayanami staring him in the face. He squeezed her tighter, trying to make sure she was real, fearing she might vanish from his arms. He didn't know if everything he'd seen was real; if any of it was real.  
  
"You can't get rid of Asuka Langley Soryu that easily." Her strength was beginning to come back. There was definitely nothing wrong with her. It was the same Asuka as always. She gazed out into the distance, noticing for the first time anything other than the boy who held her. All she could see was an endless sea of orange. A strong whiff of a familiar scent caught her off guard. 'This place smells just like the entry plug. Where am I?' She pulled away from him just enough to see his face. "Shinji, what's going on?" Her tone was firm, yet panicked. Like someone whose life hung on the answer to that question.  
  
"I'm not sure. I think... I did this." He sounded puzzled by the question. "Is this what I wanted?"  
  
"Shinji, there's no one else here!" She was becoming more and more anxious. "What did you do?" She grabbed him by the collar and glared at him. He simply turned his head away, trying to avoid the question. "Whatever you did, you need to undo it now! This isn't right, Shinji. You have to bring everyone back. Bring them back now!"  
  
"I... don't know if... I can," he stammered.  
  
"Well you had better try! Man, are you stupid." She pulled farther away from him and crossed her arms over her stomach, sitting just in front of him. Shinji closed his eyes. His brow furrowed, and his fists clenched. He began to grit his teeth. Slowly, a figure began to materalize behind him. Only the back of the person's head was visible behind him, but the long, blue hair was a clear mark of who it was.  
  
"Misato!" Asuka cried. Shinji opened his eyes, but Asuka was gone. He turned around and saw Asuka kneeling beside Misato, who was lying naked on her side. Shinji's eyes widened and he immediately darted to her. He knelt down next her, grabbed her arm and gently shook her. She looked up at him with a confused look. Quickly, that look turned into one of relief and surprise. She threw her arms around him and squeezed tightly, making him slightly uncomfortable to have a wrap her arms around him. Then she noticed her immodest condition. She pulled away from him and sat in front of him, attempting to cover her chest. She looked around to see the orange ocean the others had already discovered. "Where... What?" She looked around thoughtfully. "I guess the instrumentality actually worked. But... Why are we still here?" She turned back to Shinji, who seemed to not notice her lack of clothes. His lip quivered, and his eyes were wet.   
  
"Misato..." he trailed off. 'I pulled away - he must think I don't want him near me.' She cracked a smile. 'He's such a baby.' She wrapped her arms around him and held on, like he would disappear if she let him go. Asuka came from the side and grabbed both of them in her arms. They lingered like that for a few moments, until Misato finally broke free. She held Shinji by his shoulders and fixed her eyes on his.  
  
"Shinji, listen to me. You have to put everything back, just the way it was. You're the only one who can fix this." Misato said forcefully. "Just concentrate on the way everything was before. You can do it, I know you can." She forced a smile.  
  
"But this...this isn't what I wanted." He looked away from her to the expanse of LCL.  
  
"Look at me, Shinji." He didn't move. "Look at me!" She cried, grabbing his face and forcing him to turn her way. "None of that matters now," Her tone was gentle now, as if reassurring a small child who had just spilled his drink. "All that matters is that you fix what's gone wrong. No one will blame you for it. No one will hate you for it. If you won't do it for me, do it for Touji. Do it for Kensuke. Do it for Rei. But I'll never forgive you if you don't try." She was pleading with him now. Her words took him back to the elevator inside NERV. Back to her kiss. He looked down at the pendant from her necklace that he still held in his hand.  
  
Without a word, Shinji closed his eyes. 


	2. Something's Wrong

"Shinji!" A familiar voice stirred him from his sleep. "Get up, you lazy kid. I swear, you'd sleep until you were dead, if I let you."  
  
"Just a few more minutes, mom." He whined. "I'm tired." Yui pulled the blankets off him and turned the air conditioner on full power.  
  
"See you in a few minutes," she said cheerfully as she left, closing the door behind her. It began to feel like he was trying to sleep in the freezer. He curled into a ball, trying to stay warm. It was no use.  
  
"Fine," he snorted, crawling onto the floor. He was rolling his bed up, when he heard that voice again.  
  
"Shinji, Asuka's here!" The name sent a shiver through him. Or maybe it was only the air conditoner.   
  
'What do they say about me when I'm not supposed to hear?' He wondered. He crawled to the door and pressed his ear against it.  
  
"Is he still in bed?" Asuka said, seemingly unsurprised. "He'd sleep until he was dead, if you let him."  
  
'Something's wrong.' The words seemed to jump into his head. He pulled his ear away from the door. "What's wrong?" He said, surprised. He glanced around the room. No one one was there.  
  
'Something's wrong.' It was his voice inside his head, only he wasn't thinking it.  
  
"Tell me... tell me what's wrong." He pleaded. He was growing nervous.  
  
'Something's wrong with you, Ikari.' It was Rei's voice in his head.   
  
'Something's wrong.' It was back to his voice.  
  
"I don't understand." He grabbed his head in his hands and leaned against the door, sitting on his ankles.  
  
'Something's wrong, Shinji.'  
  
"Misato?" He looked around. He was alone. "What's going on?"  
  
'SOMETHING'S WRONG.' All three voices chimed at once.  
  
"Tell me what's wrong!" He screamed. He slid his feet out in front of him. His fists clenched on the floor beside him. Suddenly, the door behind him vanished, and he fell backward. He found himself on his back, staring straight up at Asuka. Straight up Asuka's skirt. He didn't even seem to realize what he was doing.  
  
"Hey!" She cried. "Just what do you think you're doing?" She kicked him in the shoulder, hard. "Don't you dare ever look up my skirt again, you pervert!" She backed away as he sat up.  
  
"Sorry, Asuka." He said softly.  
  
"Well, you had better be sorry. Next time I'll kick more than your shoulder," She smirked. Shinji was unaffected by the threat. He seemed to not even hear her. "Hey, don't you ignore me! Listen to me when I'm talking to you." He didn't flinch.  
  
"What's wrong, Shinji?" Yui asked with a mother's tenderness. "I heard you scream that something was wrong, so I came to check."  
  
"Nothing. Everything's fine here." He tried his best to sound convincing. Yui knew he was lying, but pretended not to notice. She knew he'd tell her if he wanted to.  
  
"If nothing is wrong, don't scream and scare everyone like that, you megadork!" She smacked him upside the head. "Now hurry up, or we'll be late for school." Asuka walked back to the table to finish the breakfast Yui made for her.  
  
"It's so sweet how she comes here to walk you to school every day," Yui said warmly. "You don't even seem to wonder why." She smiled as she got up to go finish his breakfast.  
  
"Why DOES she do it?" He said quietly to himself. "She's always done it, since..." he paused. He didn't realize what the rest of his sentence meant until the words were in his mouth. "Since the third impact." He had nearly forgotten it. 'No one remembers it, except the people who worked for NERV. And we never even talk about it. Why?'  
  
'Because something's wrong, Shinji.' It was Misato's voice again. He turned around, but only Asuka and his mother sat at the table.  
  
'Something's wrong, Ikari.' Rei's voice echoed. His eyes widened. He was getting worried now.  
  
"I know," he muttered.  
  
"Fix it." This time it was Asuka's voice. It was different from the others. It sounded real. "Your collar's up. Fix it." He turned around to see her looking at him. "Are you going to just sit there and stare at me or are you going to fix it?" She sounded annoyed.  
  
"Oh, sorry." He said as he turned his collar down.  
  
"Asuka, be nice." Yui reprimanded her.  
  
"Sorry, Mrs. Ikari," she chirped. She went back to eating.  
  
"Shinji, your breakfast will be done soon. Go ahead and wash up." Yui said. Then she went back to her meal. Shinji walked on to the bathroom, peeling his shirt off on the way there. Yui glanced up to see Asuka watching him. Asuka smiled and resumed eating once the door closed.  
  
Shinji took off the rest of his clothes and sat on the stool. The water was cold; it stung like rolling on a bed of nails as it ran over him. He turned it off and shampooed his hair. 'Why does she come here every morning? Even on Sunday, she's here when I wake up.' He smiled to himself. "It's almost like she knows I'm in love with her." He clasped his hand over his mouth. 'I didn't mean to say that. I wasn't even thinking it.' He stared blankly at the floor. "Am I?" He asked himself, confused.  
  
'Yes.' It was Misato's voice in his head again. 'You've always loved her, haven't you, Shinji?'  
  
"Of course not!" He exclaimed. "I'm not in love with Asuka."  
  
'It's because she's the only person who wouldn't let you live your lies.' It was his own voice. It was like separate parts of him were having a conversation.  
  
"My lies? I don't do that anymore! I'm different now." He refuted.  
  
'But do you know why you're different?' It was Rei this time. 'She made you better, didn't she?'  
  
"What are you talking about? How can someone who always insults me make me better?" He was becoming even more confused.  
  
'She was the only person who cared enough to show you that you needed to change.' Misato's voice returned. 'I cared, but I was afraid. Because I was the same as you, Shinji.'  
  
'Maybe she loves you, too.' Shinji's voice pondered. 'Maybe that's why she comes here.'  
  
"That's impossible." He wondered if it really was impossible.  
  
"Shinji, your breakfast is ready!" Yui called. It was then that he finally realized what he was doing. This was the first time he'd held a conversation with them.   
  
"Am I going crazy?" He rinsed the soap out of his hair. He'd have to skip washing his body for the day, or go to school hungry. He scoured the room for clean clothes, then realized he'd forgotten them. He wrapped a large towel around his waist, picked up his clothes, and walked out. He bent over to pick up his shirt, but stood up without it when he heard a flat clanging noise. He looked over to see that Asuka had dropped her fork. He focused back on his shirt as he braced himself for the outburst.  
  
"Whoops, dropped my fork." Asuka almost sounded happy when she said it. He looked over at her again, seeing her turn away and pick up the fork when he did. He bent over once more, picked up his shirt and walked to his room.  
  
"I saw that," Yui smiled.   
  
"Saw what?" Asuka indignantly replied.  
  
"It's so obvious. I'm surprised he hasn't figured it out yet." Yui said flatly.  
  
"Hey, what exactly are you talking about?" Asuka was becoming annoyed at Yui's assuming attidude. Only Asuka could get away with talking to her like that. She would have smacked anyone else.  
  
"Nothing," Yui replied. She sipped her tea calmly. "Why don't you just tell him you're in love with him?"  
  
"I am not in love with Shinji!" She cried.  
  
"I guess that answers that question," Shinji muttered as he pulled his other pant leg on. Asuka's outburst was the only part of the conversation he'd caught. He grabbed his books and walked to the kitchen. His mother was quietly finishing off her tea, while Asuka was furiously wolfing down what was left of her toast.  
  
"It's over on the counter," his mother answered before he could ask. "Hurry up, or it will get cold." Shinji sat his plate in front of the seat next to Asuka. She paused her voracious eating for a moment, then resumed. Yui smiled at her quietly behind her teacup.  
  
'I wonder what she's thinking about right now,' Shinji's voice had returned.   
  
'Just act like nothing's wrong. Pretend I don't hear it,' he thought anxiously. 'They'll think I'm crazy.'  
  
'Maybe you are crazy.' Now it was Misato. 'You never told her that you love her. Maybe that makes you crazy.'  
  
"I'm not in love with Asuka!" Suddenly everyone stopped eating. Yui and Asuka both stared blankly at him. Had he had said that out loud? His face turned blood red as he looked at his mother, then over at Asuka. 'Now what do I do? They're going to ask; they always ask. I can't tell them the truth. What do I do? What do I do?' He was beginning to panic.  
  
"Something's wrong." Now it was Asuka's voice. He was becoming more and more confused. He looked up at Asuka. Surprisingly, she had a concerned look on her face. She wasn't angry. "Is something wrong, Shinji?" Her lips moved that time. Was she really speaking before?  
  
"No, I'm ok. Everything's fine. Don't worry about me." He forced a small giggle. 'Surely that didn't throw them off.'  
  
"Fine," Asuka snorted. "Be that way. No one will ever help you unless you let them." Asuka resumed eating, while Yui continued staring at Shinji. She turned away when he caught her eyes. He pretended not to notice.  
  
'Have I really changed as much as I think?' He wondered.   
  
"It's time for you two to go, or you'll be late." Yui said suddenly. Shinji quietly got up and cleaned his plate off.  
  
"Thanks for the food, Mrs. Ikari, it was delicious!" Asuka said appreciatively.   
  
"You're welcome, Asuka. Besides, you're like family, anyway." Yui winked at her. Asuka opened her mouth to yell once more that she wasn't in love with Shinji, but stopped herself when she remembered he was right next to her.  
  
"Well then, I guess we'll be going," Asuka pushed Shinji out the door with her. "Bye, Mrs. Ikari!" 


	3. Questions

The sun shone as bright as ever in the near cloudless sky. It was nearly silent, if not for the birds and the cicadas. They always took the back streets to get to school. It was longer, but the lack of people and cars made up for it. For a brief time, it was as if the plagues of civilization never existed. At least what was still left of civilization, after Second Impact. Summer was still endless. Even Shinji couldn't put the earth back on its axis, or bring Kaworu back.  
  
"Shinji, why did you choose me?" Asuka suddenly stopped walking.  
  
"Huh?" He was blindsided by the question. "What are you talking about?"  
  
"Why did you choose me to stay with you when you took away everyone else's AT field?" She stared at his feet while she spoke, as if she feared looking him in the eye would bring about an unfavorable answer.  
  
"I..." Shinji paused for a long time, trying to figure out for himself his reasoning behind it. "I'm not sure. I guess I felt like you were the only person who wouldn't accept me for the coward I was back then." He stated the answer as it came into mind. He was a little surprised himself by what he had said. 'Isn't that what Misato's voice told me earlier?'  
  
"Oh..." Asuka trailed off. "That didn't have anything to do with it, I really just thought you were an idiot." She said playfully. It was then that she also realized why she had treated him the way she had.  
  
"I knew I should have chosen Rei," He smiled. "Come on, we're going to be late. If we're late again, we'll have to stand in the hall." He resumed walking, letting Asuka fall a few steps behind.  
  
'He's really different, isn't he?' Asuka thought to herself. 'He's always been Shinji, but he's a better Shinji now.' She smiled to herself as she walked behind him.  
  
'And that's why you love him, isn't it?' Kaji's voice said. 'That's why you stayed with him, while you lost touch with everyone else.'  
  
'What are you saying?' Asuka thought. 'I'm not in love with Shinji!'  
  
'Are you sure about that?' Now it was Misato in her head. 'Even just a little bit?'  
  
'Stop it, both of you!' Asuka was becoming irritated. She cupped her hands over her ears in a vain attempt to drown them out.  
  
'JUST TELL HIM.' They both said at once.   
  
"Stop it!" She cried. "Just stop it, please."  
  
"Asuka, what's wrong?" Shinji was facing her, holding her by her shoulders. "Are you all right?"  
  
"I'm fine! How dare you grab me like that?" She shook herself free of him. "If I want your help, I'll ask for it. Now keep walking!"  
  
"Well if nothing's wrong, don't scare people like that," he smiled.  
  
"Shut up and walk, moron." She countered. 'They'd stopped for so long that I thought they were gone. Why did they have to come back?'  
  
--------------------  
  
The bell rang just before he could slide the door open.  
  
"You two are late," the teacher said flatly. "Again."  
  
"I guess the newlyweds were a little busy this morning," someone snickered. The whole class broke into muffled laughter.  
  
"Hey, who said that? Come up here and say that to my face!" Asuka demanded. No one stood up. "Cowards," she snorted.  
  
"That's enough, all of you," the teacher said sternly. "I told you two what would happen if you were late again."  
  
"But Maya... I mean, Ibuki-Sensei..." Asuka pleaded. Maya picked up two empty buckets.  
  
"Fill them up," She said flatly. Asuka grunted as she snatched the bucket away from her and stormed out of the room, slamming the door.  
  
"Sorry about that," Shinji apologized. "You know how she is."  
  
"You don't have to apologize for her, you're not married yet." Maya winked. Shinji's face turned red as he took the second bucket.  
  
'Why does everyone keep saying things like that?' He wondered as he walked out.  
  
'Because something's wrong.' Rei's voice was in his head again. 'You have to fix it.'  
  
"What are you talking about?" Shinji growled in frustration.  
  
"All I said was how I think Maya is a lot different than when she worked at NERV," Asuka replied. "I guess you haven't noticed."  
  
"Huh?" Shinji was confused. "Oh, no, I agree. She sure has calmed down. Remember when she used to freak out at every little thing that happened back then?" Shinji chuckled.  
  
"Nothing 'little' ever happened back then," Asuka said quietly as she stared into her bucket of water. "Maya was normal. It was the rest of us who were so strange. Some days we thought it was all over and we acted like it was business as usual. That still bothers me, how cold everyone was; how cold I was." Shinji was taken aback. He'd never heard Asuka say anything so personal.  
  
"But it WAS business as usual." Shinji looked up at her. "We had to save the world every day. And in the end, we were the ones to destroy it..." Shinji trailed off.  
  
"This bucket is getting heavy," Asuka said lightly.  
  
"Yeah..." he replied. 'You mean I was the one to destroy it.' He still felt guilty for wishing everyone away.   
  
'Everyone wishes that sometimes,' Misato comforted. 'We all want everything to just go away for a while.'  
  
'But I actually made everything go away,' he countered.   
  
'It's not your fault,' Rei had returned. 'They used you.'  
  
'But it is my fault.' He was starting to feel worse. His stomach was starting to cramp.  
  
Suddenly his surroundings melted away, like wax trickling down the side of a candle. He could see the endless orange ocean. He could smell the sickening odor of blood. He felt the waves as they grotesquely lapped at his ankles. It almost seemed real.  
  
"Shinji. Yoo hoo, Shinji." Asuka was waving a hand in front of his face. "Earth to Ikari..." His body straightened. His face twisted into a bewildered expression. "You dropped your bucket, stupid. It was like you turned off or something."  
  
"Oh, sorry." He picked up his bucket just as Maya slid the door open.  
  
"Can't you two even stand in the hall without doing something weird?" She sighed. "Go get a mop, clean this up, and come back to class."  
  
"Thanks a lot, you idiot." Asuka muttered as they walked away. "I'm not helping you clean it up."  
  
"I had a flashback," Shinji's tone was sullen.  
  
"Yeah, big deal, everyone gets those sometimes. But most people don't leave orbit when they do." She said condescendingly.  
  
"It was different," his tone was unaffected. "It was like I was there, right after the Third Impact." Asuka stopped walking. Shinji stopped a few steps ahead. "I could smell it. I could see it. I could even feel it. It felt like I was really back there. Does anything like that ever happen to you?" Asuka simply stood, her eyes wide in surprise.  
  
"Of course not! Why would the same weird things happen to me? Not everyone is as messed up as you are." She said indignantly.  
  
"I get them sometimes. It's been a while since the last one. They keep getting more realistic."  
  
"Why are you telling me this?" Asuka gulped. Her tone was gentle now. It took Shinji by surprise.  
  
"Asuka, do you ever hear Misato, or Rei, or anyone else?" He asked gently.  
  
"Misato lives on the other side of the city, and no one's heard anything about Rei for almost two months." She responded, pretending not to know what he meant.  
  
"I mean in your head," his tone was still soft. "Do they ever talk to you... in your head?"  
  
"Why are you asking me this?" Her voice shook slightly.  
  
"Because I hear them," He replied flatly. "They tell me things about myself; about other people. Answers to questions I don't know how to ask. I'm afraid I'm going crazy. I always wondered if it might be from piloting Eva. I'm asking you because I want to know if I'm crazy."  
  
"Sometimes..." she said quietly. She sounded as if she would burst into tears if she said anymore.  
  
"I'm sorry, Asuka. I didn't mean to..."  
  
"No, it's ok." She interrupted. "Maybe we should find Misato and Ritsuko. They might have some answers."  
  
"Yeah, let's do that." He said kindly. He almost lost his balance when she wrapped her arms around him from behind. Her breath was hot on the back of his shoulder.  
  
"I'm scared, Shinji." She sobbed. He reached up and rubbed the top of her head.  
  
"Me too." 


	4. Contamination

She wrapped the towel around her head, twisted it and tucked it underneath itself. Then she opened the cabinet to put the shampoo up, when an ear-splitting beeping noise startled her. She dropped the shampoo on her foot, said a few choice words, and bolted to the kitchen. Smoke poured from the oven. She instinctively grabbed the handle to the oven door. She swore as she pulled her hand away from the hot metal. She checked her hand quickly for any damage. Only a small red stripe. She turned the oven off with her other hand and grabbed a hand towel to pull the door open. After nearly choking on the smoke, she rushed to the living room and threw a window open. She hurried back to the kitchen, grabbed a pot holder and pulled the oven rack out. And there it was: a whole chicken. Or, rather, a smoking lump of charcoal vaguely shaped like a chicken. She picked up the pan and dropped it in the sink. She turned the cold water on full, trying to stop the smoking. The pan twisted and crumpled until it looked like it had been beaten with a hammer a few thousand times. She backed up against the wall and slumped down to the floor. "You've gotta be kidding me," She sighed, exasperated. She glanced around the room, checking to see if anything was on fire. 'It's darker in here than usual,' she thought to herself. She reluctantly looked up to the light. It was black. So was the ceiling around it. "Of course," She muttered. "This is great. I'm really gonna get it from Ritsuko, now." She heard another beeping noise. Her heart leaped into her throat. She looked all around for the fire. Then she realized it. "He he... the doorbell," she chuckled. She then remembered that she was still only wearing a towel. "Just a minute!" She called cheerfully.  
  
She darted to another room, dropping the towel on her way. Seconds later she came running out, wearing shorts and buttoning her shirt. The towel was gone from her head. She opened the door. Shinji's and Asuka's jaws dropped. Standing before them was Misato, with her shirt half-buttoned, no bra, shoulder-length hair that looked as if she had just kissed a light switch, and a big, inviting grin on her face. Upon looking over her shoulder they also noticed smoke making its way from the open oven to the far window, large black marks on the ceiling, and a black lump in a twisted metal pan sitting in the sink.  
  
"You know, we can come back later." Shinji offered as he turned around.  
  
"Nonsense, everything's under control," Misato assured him. "Come on in, you two." Shinji and Asuka looked at each other nervously. They each swallowed hard as they carefully stepped inside. They slipped their shoes off and looked around the kitchen and living room.  
  
"This is Misato's apartment?" Asuka whispered to Shinji. "It's so... clean."  
  
"Hey, I heard that!" Misato cried indignantly. "I'll have you two know, I've turned over a new leaf. I'm not living like a teenager anymore. I appreciate what I have, and I take care if it."  
  
"It's only because she's living with Dr. Akagi," Asuka chuckled. Shinji smiled, trying to stifle his laughter. Misato opened her mouth to say something, but instead closed it and looked away.  
  
"At least she still cooks like Misato," Shinji smiled. Asuka stepped to the side as Misato's fist connected with the top of his head. He moaned as he checked for a lump.  
  
"You asked for that one," Asuka said flatly.  
  
"Now then, what can I do for you?" Misato grinned. The smiles washed away from Shinji's and Asuka's faces. They glanced at each other, then looked back at Misato.  
  
"Well, uh..." Shinji started. He wasn't quite sure how to say what he wanted to say.  
  
"We need to ask you something." Asuka finished. She paused as she turned her eyes to the floor. "It's about Eva." Her tone was quieter now. Misato's smile left her face.  
  
"I thought we agreed to never bring this up again," Misato stammered. Her fists clenched and trembled at her sides.  
  
"I know, but this might be important." Shinji pleaded.  
  
"I don't care what it is, it can't be important if it has to do with that thing." Misato's voice was rough.  
  
"I'm hearing voices in my head!" Shinji cried. Misato turned her gaze from the floor to him. He was fixed on the floor now. Her eyes were wide open in a blank stare. "They tell me things. I don't understand what they're talking about. They won't stop, they keep repeating themselves over and over. I'm afraid I'm going crazy, Misato." A tear ran down his face and dripped onto the carpet. "But if that's not important to you, then I'll just leave." He turned around to walk away, still looking at the ground.  
  
"Shinji..." Misato said quietly. "Don't go. I'm sorry, Shinji. Come in, Ritsuko should be home soon. She'll be more help than I can be." He hesitated in the doorway for a moment, then turned around and walked by her. He dropped himself on the couch and leaned his head back. Asuka sat next to him and rested her head on his shoulder. He glanced at her briefly, then returned his gaze to another unfamiliar ceiling.  
  
Everyone turned their attention to the door at the sound of an electronic lock clicking open. Ritsuko slid the door open and stepped inside. "I'm home, Misato!" She called as she slipped her shoes off. She looked up to see everyone sitting in the living room only a few meters in front of her. "Oh, I wasn't expecting company. I guess we'll have to order out tonight," she sighed as she noticed the charred remains of a very unfortunate bird in the sink. "I swear, Misato, couldn't you follow a recipe correctly just once?" No one even looked at her. The faint smile left her face. "Is something wrong?" Shinji cringed at the words.  
  
"Sit down, Ritsuko." Misato said flatly. Her tone sent a shiver up the scientist's spine. Without a word, she sat down in the chair next to Misato, across from Shinji and Asuka. Asuka's head still rested on his shoulder, while he continued to stare at the ceiling. No one had moved since Ritsuko had come in.  
  
"What's the matter?" Dr. Akagi's tone was nervous. She looked at all three of them sitting around her. Still, no one moved.  
  
"Tell her what you told me, Shinji." Misato tried her best to sound comforting. He still stared at the ceiling. Asuka turned her head to look up at him, hoping he would say something. Anything. "He said that he was hearing voices in his head," Misato spoke for him. "He said he doesn't understand what they mean, and that they won't stop." Ritsuko stared at the floor in front of her. She seemed unsurprised by what Misato had just said. "Do you have any idea what could be causing..."  
  
"Do you hear them as well, Asuka?" She interrupted. Asuka turned toward her, her head still on Shinji's shoulder. She mumbled something faintly. Her response was inaudible. Ritsuko knew what she had said only by the way she looked at her. "I see..." Ritsuko trailed off. She continued staring at the floor.  
  
"You know what it is, don't you?" Misato said nervously. "You even knew it would happen." Ritsuko was still fixed on the floor. "Why didn't you tell us?!" She screamed as a tear ran down her cheek. "If you knew, why did you..."  
  
"I wasn't sure," she interrupted again. "I wasn't sure if it would actually manifest itself or not."  
  
"If what would?" Misato demanded.  
  
"It was theorized that prolonged exposure to Eva in the entry plug could cause mild schizophrenia. It was only a theory, however. Rei showed no signs of it when we tested her prior to Shinji's arrival, so we all discounted the idea."  
  
"You keep saying 'we,' but I never heard anything about this!" Misato was becoming more and more angry.  
  
"Commander Ikari, Fuyutsuki and I feared that, if the children heard that there was a possibility of mental contamination from only regular operation, they would refuse to pilot the Eva. Now, I wish I HAD told you... and the children." She heard faint sobs coming from the couch in front of her. She finally raised her eyes. Asuka's face was buried in Shinji's neck, with her arm stretched across his chest. Shinji's arm was curled around her, his hand gently stroking the top of her head. His eyes were fixed on the table next to Dr. Akagi now.  
  
"How could you?" Misato growled through clenched teeth. "How could you not tell them? They had a right to know!"  
  
"There's nothing I can do to change what I did back then - or failed to do. If there was something I could do to make it right, I would do anything. All I can do now is say that I'm sorry. I'm truly sorry." Her tone was as steady as it had been the whole time. It was almost impossible to tell if she was sincere or not.  
  
"'Sorry' isn't going to take the voices out of my head!" Asuka's voice was muffled. Her face was still pressed against Shinji.  
  
"I know that, Asuka, but an apology is all that I can offer you." Ritsuko still spoke in the same calm voice.  
  
'Is she even capable of crying?' Asuka wondered.  
  
"Let's go, Asuka." Shinji said quietly. It was the first thing he had said since Ritsuko arrived.  
  
"B-But..." she stammered.  
  
"We got what came here for. Like she said, she can't do anything for us," he said flatly. "There's no reason to stay here." He stood up, then pulled Asuka to her feet.  
  
"No, stay. We'll go out for dinner, my treat," Misato pleaded. "You don't have to leave now."  
  
"No thanks, Misato. My mom will be upset if I miss her special shark's fin soup tonight." He tried to sound convincing. His mother always worked late on Saturday. Tonight he and Asuka would fix instant ramen and watch television, like every Saturday.  
  
"Well, thanks for coming by," Misato was trying to lighten the mood before they left. "Come visit again soon." Shinji and Asuka only nodded as they slipped their shoes on. They paused before walking out when they heard Ritsuko say something to Misato.  
  
"Why am I such a terrible person?" Her voice was weak. They turned to see Ritsuko with her head buried in her hands.  
  
"Come on, Asuka." Shinji took her by the hand as they walked out the door. 


	5. Und Ich Liebe Ihn

Asuka went in immediately after he unlocked the door and stepped out of her shoes without even breaking stride. Shinji stepped inside, slowly slipped off his shoes and slid them against the wall. He walked to the kitchen, while Asuka walked past it, stretched herself out on the couch and turned on the television. She layed her bookbag on the floor in front of the couch and pulled a notebook out.  
  
"We have chicken, shrimp, beef, and urchin-flavored ramen. Which one do you want?" He called from the kitchen, trying to speak above the noise of pans clanging as he pulled them out of the drawer.  
  
"I'm not hungry, take whichever one you want," she replied.  
  
"Yeah, I'm not either." He put the pans back and walked into the living room. Asuka pulled her legs up for him to sit down. He hesitated for a moment, amazed that she had not told him to go find his own seat. "What's that?" He pointed to the notebook she was writing in.  
  
"It's for school," she replied quietly. "I have to write a poem for literature." She was obviously very upset. She had offered him to sit with her and had not told him to 'mind his own business' when he asked about her notebook.  
  
'How could I cheer her up?' He pondered.  
  
'Tell her how you feel.' It was Misato in his head. 'Tell her that you love her.'  
  
'I can't let her know I'm hearing it again. I don't want to upset her more.'  
  
'Because you're in love with her, right?' Now it was Rei.  
  
'No I'm not! Why do you keep bothering me?'  
  
'Because something's wrong, Ikari,' Rei replied.  
  
'I know something's wrong with me. It's you!'  
  
'Something's wrong with this world,' Rei corrected. 'You have to fix it.'  
  
"Are you hearing them again?" Asuka asked.  
  
"H-how did you know?" He stammered.  
  
"Just a guess. You know, they go away when you talk to a real person. At least that works for me," she said kindly. Shinji smiled appreciatively at her. "If you start hearing them in public, say something about flowers to me. I'll do the same for you," she smiled. Shinji was surprised by her sincerity. "We're going to have to work together to deal with this." She went back to her notebook. Now he was more like astounded.  
  
"Yeah... together," he smiled at her. She looked up and smiled back.  
  
"I'll be back in a minute," she said as she got up and walked to the bathroom.  
  
'A poem...' he thought to himself. 'I didn't know Asuka wrote poetry.' He reached over and picked up the notebook. It was folded at the page she had been writing on. 'Crap, it's in German. I guess she translates it before she turns it in.' Asuka had taught him a little German, so he tried his hand at making some sense of it. Most of it escaped him, but one phrase seemed to reccur by itself every few lines: "Und ich liebe ihn." He knew that "ich liebe" meant "I love," but the rest was beyond him. He memorized the sentence so he could look it up later. Just then, he heard the water running in the bathroom. He instinctively threw the notebook back to where she had left it. Asuka opened the door and returned to her seat on the couch. She sat her notebook on the floor and stretched her legs out to cover the empty space between the two of them.  
  
"Miss me?" Asuka said playfully.  
  
"Like a hangnail," Shinji smiled. She smiled before turning her eyes to the television.  
  
"Anything good on?"  
  
"There's a new reality show on 23," he sighed as he flipped through the channels.  
  
"Ugh, are the Japanese copying those stupid things from Americans now?"  
  
"Looks that way."  
  
"Anything else?"  
  
"A new teenage soap opera on 57. Everything else is pretty much reruns."  
  
"Well then, just forget it," she sighed. Shinji turned it off and let the remote fall to the floor. They both stared at the black screen in silence.  
  
'You should tell him,' Kaji's voice chimed.  
  
'Go away!' She replied.  
  
'It's the only way, Asuka.' Now it was Misato. She covered her ears and curled her knees up to her chest.  
  
"Are they back?" Now it was Shinji's voice. She looked up at him helplessly. "Are the voices back?" He repeated. He had a concerned look on his face. She nodded slowly.  
  
"Why won't they go away, Shinji?" Her voice was shakey. "Why can't they just go away?" She threw her arms around his neck and buried her face into his chest.  
  
"Shh..." he said softly as he rubbed her head. "Don't cry, Asuka. They aren't real."  
  
"I know that," she sobbed. He could feel her hot breath on him as she spoke. "Help me, Shinji."  
  
"There's nothing to worry about," he said tenderly. "As long as you don't let them get to you, everything will be all right."  
  
With those words, her tears ceased. She still clung to him, like she was afraid to let go. They hung there in silence.  
  
'Try to get her mind on something else...' he thought to himself.  
  
"Hey Asuka?" He finally said softly.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"What does 'und ich liebe ihn' mean?" She pulled away from him and sat back on her knees.  
  
"Where did you hear that?" She asked anxiously. "Did you read my notebook?"  
  
"Um, no." He replied nervously. He braced himself for the beating.  
  
"Yes you did. Why did you read it?" Now he was in shock. She almost sounded happy.  
  
"I dunno. I didn't understand anything, I just saw that phrase over and over again." His voice was becoming panicked. He knew that she still might attack him. "I was just wondering what it meant."  
  
"It means: 'And I love him.'" She chuckled. She smiled at him. "It's about someone who is very important to me."  
  
"Oh," he replied, puzzled that she had volunteered information like that. "Who is it about?"  
  
Without a word, Asuka leaned closer to him. Shinji's eyes popped wide open as he felt her soft, moist lips gently embrace his. Her breath carressed his face like a warm breeze on a sunny day. Her fingers trailing through his hair sent a chill down his spine. After the initial shock, he finally closed his eyes and let the sensations wash over him. His entire body felt weightless and tingley. After what seemed like hours, she pulled away and they both opened their eyes. Asuka pressed her forehead against his and smiled.  
  
"You," she whispered. 


	6. Neon Genesis

"The plan has failed."  
  
"No, it has only been delayed."  
  
"The Human Instrumentality shall come to be. We shall be one with God!"  
  
"Yes, eternal tranquility for all of mankind."  
  
"What has gone wrong?"  
  
"A mistake was made in the choosing of the pilots."  
  
"This organization cannot afford mistakes."  
  
"Agreed. This must be corrected."  
  
"Why did the plan fail, Fuyutsuki?"  
  
"Evidently, he was not the one."  
  
"How could this be?"  
  
"That's impossible!"  
  
"This organization is incapable of making such an error."  
  
"Well then, what do you gentlemen suppose went wrong?"  
  
"Do not speak so condescendingly to this committee, Fuyutsuki. People have disappeared for less."  
  
"It is strange, isn't it? Why don't you remember anything beyond the termination of the seventeenth angel? It seems that NERV employees are the only ones with any recollection."  
  
"We have yet to see proof that you remember anything!"  
  
"It is rather odd that over one hundred people, all of whom NERV personel, have recently consulted therapists regarding a certain disturbing dream in which all of humanity, including themselves, vanished, and yet continued to exist."  
  
"Yes, we have been aware of this for some time."  
  
"It is proof of nothing!"  
  
"The rest of this meeting does not concern you, Fuyutsuki. You'll be hearing from us very soon."  
  
"A pleasure, as always, gentlemen."  
  
A large screen flickered off amongst a circle of several other similar screens.  
  
"He speaks the truth! What do we do about this?"  
  
"No pilots; the Evangelions, Adam and Lilith have disappeared... we're back where we started!"  
  
"How could this have happened? That boy has made a mockery of us!"  
  
"Collect yourselves. We simply proceed as if nothing has happened. Begin the search for the new pilots."  
  
"Of what good are pilots without Evangelions?"  
  
"Agreed. We must first determine the whereabouts of Lilith. Then, we can create more Evangelions. This time, our plan shall not fail."  
  
------------------------------------------------------------  
  
The sunlight streamed in through the half-opened window on the far side of the room. The sun was still low enough that the rays bathed the sofa in a warm, soothing glow. Shinji stirred slightly, yawned and rubbed his eyes. He first noticed the beautiful red-head sleeping peacefully with her head rested on his chest. He gazed around the room as well as he could, doing his best not to disturb her. Everything was still in the same place as the night before, yet something seemed unfamiliar. There was a shadow cast on the wall opposite the window. A person's shadow. He sat up with a start, causing Asuka to roll over and lay her head between his shoulder and the couch.  
  
"Don't worry, I called her mother when I got home last night," a woman's voice said quietly. It was his mother. "You two looked like you were sleeping so soundly, I didn't want to wake you."  
  
'When did I fall asleep?' He wondered. 'Was last night even real?'  
  
"It's only seven-thirty," she whispered. "Go back to sleep." Asuka lifted her head and sat up, rubbing her eyes and looking around her.  
  
"Huh? Where...?" she mumbled sleepily. She turned around to discover that Shinji was lying under her. "How'd you get here?"  
  
"I think we fell asleep on my couch last night," he smiled.  
  
"Oh..." she sighed. She layed down on top of him again, falling asleep almost instantly.  
  
"I'll wake you up in a few hours," Yui smiled sweetly. Shinji layed his head down and let his eyelids drop.  
  
'Something's wrong,' Rei was talking to him again. 'You can't let them do it.'  
  
'Go away,' he replied.  
  
'It's coming, Ikari. You can't let them do it.'  
  
'What are you talking about?' He knew she would persist even if he ignored her.  
  
'The end is coming. You have to fix it.'  
  
'The end of what?'  
  
'The end of humanity.' A strange orange glow filled his eyes, even though they were closed. He immediately snapped them open. He was lying on a beach. The only sound was that of the waves gently peeling sand from the shore. He looked up into the cloudless blue sky, unsure of whether to get up or try to make it go away. The breeze picked up from the sea, carrying with it that disgusting stench.  
  
'Blood...' his stomach turned. "I thought... I fixed this."  
  
'But you didn't, did you?'  
  
"Yes, I did. Everything went back to the way it was supposed to be. I brought everyone back."  
  
'Are you sure?'  
  
"What do you mean? What kind of a question is that?"  
  
"Help me, Shinji!" It was Misato. Her voice seemed to come from everywhere.  
  
"Where are you?" He was growing more anxious.  
  
"I'm right here!"  
  
"Where?" He sat up and frantically looked around. "I can't see you!"  
  
"Right in front of you..." She trailed off. He looked down at his feet. The ripples in the orange sea began to swirl. The liquid swelled upwards, like bread rising in an oven. It formed itself into a rough sphere, which gradually warped into what resembled a person's head. Then, a face began to take shape.  
  
"M-M-Muh..." he stammered. "Misato?" He swallowed hard.  
  
"Hel...p m...eeee..." Her mouth twisted and contorted into a large, vaguely round opening. He scrambled backwards and raised his arm up in front of him, like he felt it could attack at any moment. His eye twitched slightly as his lips warped into a psychotic smile. Then, with a piercing shriek, the grotesque abomination sunk back into the waves.  
  
"You have to help her, Ikari." It was Rei again. "You're the only one who can stop them." It sounded like she was right behind him. He twisted around to find himself staring at her knees. He tilted his head up to face her. She was wearing her plug suit. He tried to speak, but there was no sound. "Help me, Shinji."  
  
'That's the first time she's called me anything but "Ikari,"' he thought. "What do you mean?" He pleaded. "You have to tell me what to do!"  
  
"I don't know. Help me..." she trailed off. She suddenly burst into orange liquid, leaving her plug suit behind on the sand. He could only watch, horrified and confused, as the rife fluid trickled down to meet the ocean in little rivers. He crawled away from a rogue stream that nearly touched him.  
  
"Shinji..." It was Asuka's voice. He looked all round him, but he was alone. "You have to stop it." She almost sounded angry.  
  
"Asuka?" He said quietly. Suddenly, he found himself sinking into the sand. Slowly at first, but he sank faster whenever he moved. Before he realized what had happened, his head had gone under. He felt himself falling. He could only feel the air rushing past his ears. He was unsure of whether he was even screaming or not. Then he hit. His eyes popped open, revealing a very annoyed red-haired girl in a school uniform glaring down at him.  
  
"You have to stop sleeping so late," she said forcefully. "It's after eleven!" She walked around him, passing behind his head. He suddenly realized he was lying on the floor. He rubbed the back of his head as he stood up.  
  
"Did you have to do that?" He asked, slightly irritated. "That really hurt."  
  
"Well, it serves you right, rolling on top of me like you did. I woke up and I couldn't breathe!" She replied angrily.  
  
"Oh, sorry" He said quietly. He straightened up the ruffled couch cushions.  
  
"Come on, your breakfast is ready." Her tone was kind now. "I made it myself!" She smiled sweetly at him. He stared at her with a puzzled look on his face.  
  
"Oh...I hope you didn't go to too much trouble."  
  
"Nonsense!" She chimed. "Now, come over here and eat." She pulled a chair out and motioned for him to sit down. He cautiously walked over, sat down and pulled the chair up. "Here you are," she smiled wide. She set a plate in front of him with a napkin over top of it. There seemed to be a large portion under it. He slowly lifted the napkin, wondering if something would attack him once it was off the plate. Finally, he quickly pulled it away. His face turned to one of surprise and utter disappointment.  
  
"Rice balls?" He asked flatly. "You made me rice balls?"  
  
"Something WRONG with rice balls?" She sounded as if she wanted him to say something to anger her.  
  
"No, no, they're... fine," he forced a smile. "They look delicious."  
  
"Well, hurry up and eat. I want to beat the crowd to the beach."  
  
"Huh?" He looked up at her, holding one of the balls in his hand.  
  
"Don't tell me you forgot!"  
  
"No, I just didn't think that was today."  
  
"I swear, you'd miss out on everything if I wasn't here to remind you. You can be really stupid sometimes."  
  
'Maybe last night really was a dream,' he thought as he took his first bite. He chewed a few times, then paused.  
  
"Wow, these are great!" He exclaimed, his mouth full of rice. A few grains flew onto the table. "What did you put in these?"  
  
"That's a secret," she smiled. "See? Even if you don't expect to like something, it may end up surprising you," she winked at him. He suddenly stopped eating.  
  
"Yeah..." he trailed off. After a few moments, he resumed eating. Asuka sat down in the seat opposite him. She layed her head on her hand, making mock circles in the wood with the other. Shinji seemed to not notice anything other than his food. Grains of rice fell to his plate with each bite he took. The sun was higher now, and the couch was shrouded in the shadow of the wall once more. The ethereal glow made it impossible to tell morning from evening without the aid of a clock. Perhaps the clock was wrong, and it the sun was on its way down to the horizon instead up through the sky.  
  
"Hey Shinji?" She finally broke the silence.  
  
"Yeah?" He continued eating.  
  
"Did you want me to kiss you?" She asked quietly. Her finger continued to chase itself in circles on the table. Shinji put what was left of his last rice ball on the plate. He sat quietly for what seemed like hours.  
  
"I don't know," he finally replied.  
  
"It's a simple question. Either you did, or you didn't." Her tone made it seem as if the answer made no difference.  
  
"If you mean 'Was I hoping you would?', then, no." He said quietly.  
  
"...I see." Her finger stopped moving.  
  
"But, if you mean 'Am I glad you did?', then I would have to say..." she finally looked up at him as he paused for a moment. "I would have to say 'yes.'" He smiled slightly as he fixed his eyes on hers. She opened her mouth to say something, but only returned his smile. Shinji picked up the rest of his rice ball. Just as he took a bite, he felt something warm and soft take hold of his hand. He hesitated for a moment, then squeezed her hand. He felt her grip tighten around his and smiled again. He looked up at her staring at him.  
  
'So this is what it's like,' he thought to himself. 'This is how it feels to be happy.'  
  
He returned his focus to the food in his hand, only the rice ball was gone. In its place was a hand - just a hand. It was roughly severed at the wrist, as if it had been gnawed off a person's body. He shrieked and dropped it to his plate. Sweat beads began forming on his forehead as he stared at his own hand. It was covered in blood.  
  
'Your mouth.' It was Rei's voice.  
  
'Tell me what's going on!' He was tired of trying to ignore it.  
  
'Clean your mouth.' He wiped his mouth with the back of his other hand. His hand was smeared red where he had rubbed it across his lips. He was almost hyperventilating now.  
  
"How did I...what...when did it...why won't..." he blubbered. His throat seemed to be tightening.  
  
"Just hold on... a little longer..." The voice was unfamiliar.  
  
"Everything's going to be fine, Shinji. Just hang in there!"  
  
"Asuka?" He mumbled weakly. He suddenly realized his eyes had been closed. He managed to force them open slightly.  
  
'I'm moving... those lights... I'm on my back? What's going on?'  
  
"Doctor, his eyes are open. I think he's awake!" It was his mother. "Is that a good sign?"  
  
"This is where you two stop." It was that same strange voice. "Just sit tight and let them do their job." He saw a door frame pass overhead and felt himself come to a stop.  
  
"Sleep tight, kid." A man wearing glasses and a mask put something over his face. "Everything'll be all right when you wake up."  
  
------------------------------------------------------------  
  
Asuka lied in an armchair curled into a ball, crying uncontrolably. She hugged her legs, her face buried in her knees. "We were just sitting there, talking..." she sobbed to herself. "I grabbed his hand, he squeezed and looked up at me, then he just fell over."  
  
"Shhh... It's all right," Yui said softly. She walked over to Asuka's chair and crouched down. "Everything will be just fine." She reached up and gently rubbed Asuka's head. Asuka looked up at her with puffy, red eyes. Yui only gave her a warm smile. It was all she could do to keep bursting into tears herself.  
  
A door suddenly flew open on one side of the room. A woman with dark blue hair rushed to the desk. "I'm looking for Shinji Ikari." She sounded out of breath.  
  
"And who might you be?" The clerk asked.  
  
"I'm his..." she paused. "I'm his aunt."  
  
"Misato, over here!" Yui called to her. She turned around and hurried over to her. "They took him in a few minutes ago. Asuka said that he just fell over for no reason at all." Another door opened at the opposite side of the room. A woman in scrubs carrying a clipboard stood in the doorway.  
  
"Is the guardian of Shinji Ikari here?" She looked around the room. Yui stood up and walked to her.  
  
"I'm his mother. Did they find out anything?" She asked anxiously.  
  
"The doctor said he suffered a small aneurism in a non-vital part of the brain. They're going to operate immediately. We'll have to keep him overnight, but the doctor said he should make a full recovery." Yui breathed a sigh of relief.  
  
"Thank you, I'll pass that along." She bowed and walked back to the others. Everyone relaxed a little when she told them, and Asuka finally got out of the fetal position.  
  
'It's a good thing you told him.' Rei's voice echoed inside Asuka's head.  
  
'Yeah. If he had died just now, he would have never known how you felt.' Now it was Kaji. 'What a sad story that would have made.'  
  
"How can you be so cold?" Asuka mumbled softly.  
  
"What was that, Asuka?" Yui asked softly. "I didn't quite catch that."  
  
"I, uh... I said I was getting cold." Her voice shook. Misato looked down at her. They apparently had not told Yui what Ritsuko had said.  
  
"I'll get you a blanket, Asuka," Misato smiled. She walked away towards the counter and returned shortly with a red blanket. "This was all they had," she smiled as she handed it to her.  
  
"It's okay. Thank you," she sniffled as she wrapped it around her. A woman slowly approached them from the desk. It was the same nurse with the clipboard.  
  
"You folks may as well go home and get some rest. There isn't much you can do here," she smiled, trying to sound comforting.  
  
"Maybe you're right, I'm exhausted," Yui yawned as she stood up. "Would you like to stay at my house tonight, Asuka?"  
  
"I'd rather stay here," she said weakly. "It's not like I'll get any sleep, anyway." She hugged the blanket tighter.  
  
"I'll stay with her, you get some rest. She'll be fine." Misato assured Yui. Yui smiled as she looked as Asuka, already fast asleep on Misato's shoulder.  
  
"Good night." 


	7. Contemplation

August 4th  
  
He went home yesterday. It's been five days since that morning. He just sort of turned off, like someone flipped a switch. I don't think I've ever been more terrified. Even during the Eva Wars, I knew that that somehow the Eva would protect him. It was almost like it loved him. But this time, there was nothing like that to help him. All I could do was hold his head up and call an ambulance. I felt so helpless. I suppose he and his mother will be thanking the doctors for doing such a wonderful job, or maybe the ambulance driver for going so fast. But none of them knew him. They just did their jobs. To them, he was just another piece of that day - that day just a piece of their careers. But I was the one who was scared. I was the one who slept in a chair in that noisy waiting room so I'd be the first to hear how he was. I'm the one who wanted to save him. I'm sorry, Shinji.  
  
-Asuka Langley Soryu  
  
August 5th  
  
He wasn't at school today. I tried to concentrate, but it was useless. In the end I faked a stomach-ache, but I threw up for real. The nurse sent me home after that. I've been wondering what caused that to happen. No, I haven't. I snuck out to see him after my mother said I couldn't because I was sent home. He seemed fine, though a little lethargic. Yui said it was partly the sedatives and partly just being tired from everything. We talked for a long time, but he never said anything about what happened that morning, or the night before. I wonder if he even remembers. If that's the case, I won't ask him about it. He needs someone whom he can depend on when he really needs them. Besides, if he did forget, it must not have meant much to him. By the time I got home, everyone was asleep. My window was still open, even though a few things in my room had been moved. My mother never said anything about my leaving.  
  
-Asuka Langley Soryu  
  
August 6th  
  
I decided to start keeping a diary. Or a journal, for a guy. Well, whatever it is, I'm going to write things in it that I want to remember. Now I want to remember.  
  
Asuka came over yesterday. She sat on my bed the whole afternoon, just talking with me. It really cheered me up. I hadn't seen her since that morning I collapsed. I only remember what I think were hallucinations from that day. The doctor said that I was lucky to be here. Apparently Asuka stayed the whole night in waiting room alone, sleeping in a chair with a blanket wrapped around her. I guess that night she kissed me was real, after all. She never said anything about it. I wonder if she meant it. I guess I won't say anything to her about it. After all, if she didn't mean it, she's probably hoping that I forgot. I don't want to force her to tell me that it was all just a mistake. I want to thank her for that morning, but she'd probably say something like: "Of course I called the paramedics! I could have gone to jail if I hadn't!" I guess I won't bother.  
  
-Shinji Ikari  
  
------------------------------------------------  
  
His eyes slowly cracked open to the gentle wash of morning light pouring in through the window. The air conditioner hummed on, drowning out any noises that dare disturb him. 'It's Sunday...' He smiled as he wallowed in the thought. 'Nowhere to go, nothing to do, and no reason to get up.' The telephone rang, like a crying baby that demanded attention. 'Mom will get that,' he smiled. A second ring. A third. "Mom's at work," he moaned pitifully as he got to his feet. A fourth ring. "Yeah, yeah, yeah..." he said in a groggy voice. He had just opened his door when it rang a fifth time. He made his way to the wall and picked up the phone. "Ikari house," he tried to sound awake. No answer. "Hello?" It clicked a few times, then it was just the dialtone. "Oh well." He put the phone back and turned to walk back to his room. The phone blared again. He immediately picked it up, irritated that he had been made to get out of bed. "Hello?"  
  
"Shinji! Thank God." It was Misato. "Get dressed. I'm taking you to NERV."  
  
"Huh? Why?" He was not in the mood for confusing things this early.  
  
"They found Unit 01." Her voice was flat. Shinji did not know how to reply.  
  
"W-uh, um... what? When?" He stammered.  
  
"Two days ago. Ritsuko just found out. She called from NERV right before I called you. She's not sure, but she thinks they found 2 units from the Eva Series, too." She paused. "Shinji, if this is true..."  
  
"I know." He didn't want to hear her finish. They hung in silence for a few seconds.  
  
"I'll be there in fifteen minutes." Click. He set the phone back on the wall.  
  
'It's all starting over.' He could barely force himself to believe it. 'I thought... I fixed everything.'  
  
'You did.' It was Rei in his head. 'But you have to fix it again.'  
  
'How? Am I supposed to pilot Eva again?'  
  
'Do you want to pilot it?'  
  
'Of course not!' He wondered if that was really the truth. He had done it for so long, and it ended so abruptly. Maybe he had grown to enjoy it. Maybe he had grown to miss it.  
  
'You have to.'  
  
'Why?'  
  
'Because it's the only way. You're the only one who can fix it.'  
  
'I know that...'  
  
'Help me, Shinji.'  
  
'How? How do I help you?'  
  
'You have to hide me.'  
  
'Hide you? Why? From whom?'  
  
'Help me, Shinji.' Her voice was weakening.  
  
'Where are you?'  
  
'You know... where.'  
  
'No, I don't know where! Tell me where you are!' No response.  
  
"What am I supposed to do?!" He slammed his fist hard against the kitchen floor. He heard a splash as his hand connected. He looked down at the floor. There was no floor. Instead he was sitting in a puddle of orange liquid. He squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head furiously. "This isn't real, this isn't real..." he repeated over and over to himself. He finally stopped and opened his eyes. He swallowed hard as he cautiously looked down at the floor. Beige tile, the same as always. His hand was dry, too. He forced a smile in an attempt to shrug it off. Just then someone started frantically beating on the door.  
  
"Shinji! Come on, let's go!" It was Misato.  
  
'Already?' He looked up at the clock above the door. It had been twenty minutes since she had called.  
  
"Hurry up! This is serious!" She called again.  
  
"I'm coming!" He assured her. He bolted back to his room, quickly swapped shirts and was in the hallway before she could knock again. Without a word, he locked the door behind him and they both sprinted for her car. He threw the passenger door open and sat down, then pulled the door closed just as the car started backing up.  
  
"We're picking up Asuka next. You'll have to squeeze in the back." The car was designed for only two people, but there was just enough room in the back to lay down curled in a ball. He stared silently at the road ahead.  
  
"Will I have to pilot it again?" He asked quietly.  
  
"...I don't know. But if you do, we won't let them use us like..." she paused. "Like the last time. Your father's been reasigned. He's Fuyutsuki's second-in-command now. I'm not sure if I trust either of them..."  
  
"I take my orders from you." He interrupted. Misato shot him a surprised look. "Whatever you decide is what I'll do."  
  
"Shinji..." she trailed off. She had nothing to say, anyway. They rode in silence to Asuka's, who gave her usual strong opinion as soon as she got in. Once she calmed down, however, everyone was silent the rest of the way. It was like they had so much to say that they didn't know what to say. After what seemed like hours going down that elevator, they finally arrived. Asuka and Misato immediately bolted out, leaving Shinji behind to writh his way out of the back. When he had almost given up, someone opened the passenger door. He looked up to see a familiar red-head grinning at him.  
  
"Having some trouble?" She asked playfully. Her demeanor completely contrasted against the larger issue at hand.  
  
"A little," he grunted, still trying to free himself. She reached down and flipped the seat forward. She winked at him as she turned and walked away. He hesitated for a moment, then finally broke free and rejoined two women.  
  
"Shinji, Asuka, there was an accident here yesterday." Misato stared at the floor as she spoke. The two looked up at her with anxious confusion. "They were running some tests on Unit 01. Rei was piloting it. For no apparent reason, it suddenly went berserk. They cut the cable and it switched to its internal battery. I guess she panicked and ejected the plug. The Eva was all over the place, and it..." Misato paused as a tear dripped to the floor. "It stepped on the plug. Guys, Rei's..." She burst into tears before she could finish.  
  
"No... no..." was all Asuka could say. She tried fighting back the tears. Shinji could only stare at the floor.  
  
'No more clones...' He shook his head. 'Even if their were more, it wouldn't be the same Rei.'  
  
"Everyone is trying to block it out so they can function," Misato had almost stopped crying. "Try not to mention anything about it, okay?" The two children barely managed to nod. "It'd be best if you didn't walk in crying, either." She forced a smile.  
  
They swiped their cards and walked through the doors leading into NERV. Ritsuko stood directly in front of them. "It's about time. Let's go." 


	8. Pro Tempore

"Sir! An unidentified object has mobilized in storage area 3!"

"What is it?" Fuyutsuki was as calm as ever. "Isn't that where we put the two units from the Eva series after we completed repairs?"

"Affirmative, Sir. Still scanning to determine what..." he stopped, as if his voice had suddenly been stolen from his throat. "Sir! Identity confirmed. It's Unit 04 of the Eva Series!"

"What?" Fuyutsuki was becoming worried. "What's it doing?"

"We can't tell what its objective is, sir, but it appears that someone's inside it!"

The doors suddenly slid open and Ritsuko, Misato, Shinji and Asuka all burst into the room.

"What's going on?" Ritsuko yelled up at Fuyutsuki above the blaring alarm. Shinji and Asuka gazed around the command center. It was exactly as they remembered it.

"Commander, Unit 04 has broken through the partition door and is heading toward the lauchpad! Sir, what do we do?" Fuyutsuki simply stood there silently "Uh, sir?" Fuyutsuki looked down at Shinji.

"Shinji, would you do us a favor?" He sounded like a father asking his son to take out the garbage.

"You want me to pilot it again." He stared at the flashing red dot on the large screen at the end of the room.

"We don't know what its objective is, or even who is controlling it. It may want to kill us all. It might kill you and Asuka, as well."

'Asuka...' Shinji rolled the thought around in his mind. 'It could kill Asuka, and I'd be resposible for not doing anything.'

"Hey! How come you want this idiot to take that thing on and not me? I could do it way better than he could even hope to!" Asuka objected.

"Because you're sync ratio with Unit 01 was never tested, and we can't afford for anything to go wrong in the middle of battle, that's why. Now, pipe down and use your head for once!" Ritsuko answered sternly.

"Y-yes ma'am. Sorry." Ritsuko's scolding only made her more angry.

"But I can't give you orders like that anymore. So, I'm asking you." Fuyutsuki continued.

"I'll do it." He replied flatly. Everyone's attention turned to him. "But only under Misato's command."

"Shinji..." Asuka said quietly. "You don't have to, you know."

"Of course I have to. I'd be responsible if it killed us all."

"All right, it's your decision," Misato looked up at Fuyutsuki. "I'll command the sortie, it'll be just like old times, right?" She forced a smile. That cliche hadn't been as comforting as she'd hoped.

"Right." Shinji also forced a smile.

"Get suited up. Unit 01 is in the same place it used to be." Without a word, he bolted to the locker room.

"Who could this new enemy be?" Fuyutsuki muttered to himself.

"All right, I'm in." Shinji's voice came over the com. "Where do I go?" He sounded like he wanted to get it over with as soon as possible.

"Unit 04 isn't far from your location," Misato answered. "Break through the wall behind you and then through the wall to your right in the next room and you'll be there. Once you're in, you need to..."

"Disable it and capture the pilot for questioning." Fuyutsuki interrupted. "We need to find out who's behind this." Misato turned and glared at him.

"Excuse me, sir, but I believe I am in command of this battle." She objected.

"Correct. And, in turn, I am in command of you, Major Katsuragi." He retorted.

"Misato, what do I do?" Shinji asked her directly.

"Destroy the Eva, Shinji..." she paused. "And the pilot."

"What?!" Asuka exclaimed. "Misato, don't you think that's a little extreme?"

"Shut up, Asuka!" Misato shouted. She glared over her shoulder at the girl.

"No, Shinji, leave the pilot alive!" Fuyutsuki ordered.

"Sir, Shinji has blocked communication from central command."

"Did he hear what I told him?" Fuyutsuki was becoming more and more anxious.

"I believe so, sir." Fuyutsuki seemed to calm down a little.

"Reestablish communication as soon as possible." Fuyutsuki said dryly.

"Yes sir."

"I don't know who that kid's going to listen to."

------------

Unit 01 finally broke into the storage room where the othe Eva was being held. Unit 04 was trying to break through the last wall to the lauch pad. It saw Shinji and immediately took a defensive position. Shinji lunged toward it and pinned it against the wall. Unit 04 immediately pulled its legs up and kicked him against the far wall. Shinji closed his eyes and braced himself for the attack. Nothing.

"Huh?" He opened his eyes. It was trying to break through the wall again. 'Maybe it just wants to get out,' he thought to himself. 'Even if it won't fight, I still have to stop it.'

He pulled out the Progressive Knife and lept towards the other Evangelion. It sidestepped his attack and forced him to the ground as he passed by it. Shinji landed on his stomach and his knife slid to the other side of the room. He reached out for it, but Unit 04 stepped on his hand before he could get to it. He cried out again as he grabbed it by the ankle and pulled it to the ground. Quickly, he grabbed the knife, rolled on top of the other Eva and buried the vibrating blade in its neck. Its hand reached up as red fluid sprayed from the opening. Shinji twisted the knife and cut up through its head until the knife broke free. Its hand jerked suddenly, then fell the the ground.

------------

"Sir, communication restored."

"Bring up an image, I want to see what's going on." Fuyutsuki was relieved, although his demeanor seemed exactly the same.

"Yes sir." The large screen flickered on. It was from Unit 01's point of view. It held the entry plug in its left hand. It was still intact.

"Shinji!" Fuyutsuki exclaimed. "Don't do it, Shinji. You don't want to be a murderer, right?" His tone was gentle, like someone negotiating with a kidnapper.

'Murderer...' the word cut through his mind.

"Destroy it, Shinji! That's an order!" Misato shouted.

"No! Don't kill someone who can't fight back!" Fuyutsuki pleaded.

"You said you only follow my orders, right Shinji?" Misato said confidently. "You know better than to listen to these conspirators anymore, right? Who knows what they plan on doing with whomever is inside? Don't let them use to carry out their agenda! Don't you remember the last time? Destroy it, Shinji!"

'Last time...' All the memories of being manipulated came rushing back to him. He closed his hand around the plug.

"Shinji, no!" Asuka screamed. He froze.

"Asuka?" He said quietly.

"Don't do it Shinji, please!" She sobbed. "If you do... I'll never forgive you. Do you hear me? I'll never forgive you!"

'Asuka's crying because of what I'm doing. I always end up making her unhappy.'

"I told you to shut up!" Misato yelled. Shinji heard what sounded like someone being smacked across the cheek over the communicator.

"Misato!" Shinji screamed as loud as he could. He set the plug down. He ejected his plug and climbed down the Eva. Once on the ground, he ran as fast as he could to central command.

He burst through the doors, never slowing down as set his sights on the blue-haired woman standing in front of Asuka. "Misato!" He screamed again. She turned to him just as his fist connected with her nose in full force. Her nose seemed to explode as blood splattered in all directions. She staggered back a few steps before falling to the ground. Shinji immediately jumped on her and grabbed her by the neck.

"I'll kill you if you ever touch her again!" He slammed her head into the ground. "You hear me? I'll kill you! I'll kill you!"

"Shinji, stop it!" Ritsuko pleaded. Everyone else could only watch in shock. "Get off her, Shinji." He didn't move.

"Shinji, stop." Asuka said quietly. "That's enough. I'm all right." He loosened his grip. Misato coughed, frantically gasping for air. He looked down at his hands. A tear dripped down his cheek into his left hand.

"My God..." he said quietly. He trembled as he sat there on her stomach. "What am I doing? What's wrong with me?"

"Shinji..." Asuka sobbed. She sniffled as she wiped her nose on her sleeve.

'It's all my fault, it's all my fault, it's all my fault...' He still stared at his hands. "It's all my fault!" He screamed as he ran out through the same doors he had entered.

"I'll go after him." Asuka said quietly as she turned and ran after him.

"Send a security team to storage area 3. Take the pilot into custody." Fuyutsuki seemed unaffected by what had just happened. No one moved. "Before the pilot escapes, if you don't mind."

"Y-yes sir."

Within moments, a security team was positioned around the entry plug. Two men moved toward the hatch. One slowly opened it, while the other kept his gun fixed on it. The hatch creaked open and a blue-haired girl stepped out with her hands up.

"I thought she was confined to Central Dogma." Fuyutsuki was puzzled.

"She was," Ritsuko confirmed. "How did she escape?" 


	9. Layed to Rest

August 8th

I don't really know what to say about yesterday. When he attacked Misato liked that, it didn't seem like it was even really happening. He's so passionate about protecting me, but I couldn't even protect him from that terrible experience.  
Misato had been like our mother, but there was something about the way her eyes looked when she kept telling him to crush the plug. It was like she needed him to do it, like a great plan had climaxed in that moment. I've never seen her like that before. It wasn't the Misato that took care of Shinji and I. She almost seemed like another person. I'm still trying to stop thinking about it.  
Maybe one day I'll be able to protect him, but not now. Until then, I suppose. I love you, Shinji.

- Asuka Langley Soryu

August 8th

I started this journal because I wanted to remember things. I'm not as sure about that now.  
Maybe everyone should just stay away from me. I only end up hurting them. Like Asuka - I want to make her happy, but I only end up making her cry. She could never be happy with someone like that. The Devil has no companions. Maybe that's what I am: The Devil. Someone who can only hurt others. But I don't want to hurt them. If my existence can only cause pain, maybe the best thing is to not exist. I'm sorry, Asuka. I tried.

- Shinji Ikari

He put his pen down and stood up. "It's time," he quietly said to himself. He walked into his mother's bedroom and opened her bottom dresser drawer. Then reached toward the back and lifted up a handfull of socks. Its hard surface felt cold on the tips of his fingers. He closed his hand around it an pulled it out. He held it up to the window, tilting it side to side as he mesmerized himself with the moonlight's shimmer along the barrel. He checked the magazine. It was full. He slowly walked back to his room and layed down on the bed. He gently closed his eyes as he wrapped his lips around the barrel. 

'I don't want mom to have to clean this up,' he thought. He placed a pillow behind his head and layed back down. "Goodbye, Asuka..." He slid the gun back in his mouth. Shinji closed his eyes tightly and squeezed.

He pulled the gun back out. He was nearly hyperventilating. A bead of sweat trickled from his forehead down his cheek. "Oh God," he panted. "The safety..." He pushed the small lever up and bit onto the barrel again. He began to squeeze slowly as he clenched his eyes shut.

He loosened his grip and the gun dropped to his chest. "I can't do it," he sobbed. He sat up, letting the gun fall to the floor. "I just can't do it." He layed his face in his hands. "I don't even have the balls to take the coward's way out!" He sprang up and screamed as he drove his hand through the far wall.

Then the phone rang. He pulled his hand out and walked out into the short hallway. It rang again. He slowly walked across the kitchen towards the screaming object. A third ring. "Hello?" He said it cheerfully, as if the last few moments never happened.

"Shinji..."

"Ayanami?!" He shrieked. "You're alive! Where are you?" It felt like his heart was in his throat. 

"Help me, Shinji..." Her voice sounded weaker than usual.

"Where are you? I can't help if I don't know what's wrong!"

"There isn't much time." He could hear people shouting in the background.

"Tell me where you are!" He cried desperately.

"I can't. You know where..."

"Get her! Hurry, before she hangs up!" He heard men yelling.

"Who's that? What's going on?"

"Don't answer when it rings." Click.

"Rei!" She was gone. He hung the phone up and leaned against the wall. It immediately rang. He instinctively reached for it, but stopped. It rang again. A third time. A fourth. Then it hit him. 'The answering machine!' He immediately ripped the phone off the wall, pulling the cord out with it.

'Shinji?' A voice echoed in his head.

'Asuka? Is that you?'

'Why didn't you do it? All you had to do was squeeze.'

'I couldn't do it.'

'Why not? Did you break your finger or something?'

'Now you're against me, too...'

'I'm not against you.'

'Yes you are! Everyone's against me. They just pretend to like me when they need me to help them. There's no point in living in a world where you're nothing more than a toy for others.'

'I don't pretend.'

'Yes you do! You were pretending that night you kissed me.'

'You're wrong.'

'Then why are acting like you wanted me to do it?!'

'I just want you to be happy... whether you're alive or not.'

'What's that supposed to mean?'

'Why did you hit her, Shinji?'

'... I don't know.'

'Why did you hit her?'

'Because she hit you.'

'So you were defending me?'

'I guess so.'

'Or were you defending yourself?'

'Defending... myself?'

'Maybe that was your way of telling her that you weren't going to do it.'

'That doesn't make any sense!'

'You won't take orders from anyone now - even Misato.'

'Whoever that was, it wasn't Misato. There's no way she's the same person.'

'There you go again, saying that you know people! You're so stupid! You have no idea what goes on in her head.'

'You're right. Nothing's changed. Everything's the same as it used to be.'

'I thought that this is what you wanted.' Now it was Rei's voice.

'What are you talking about? This IS what I wanted.'

'Then why aren't you happy?'

'What's there to be happy about?!'

'But why wish for a world that only brings you sorrow?'

'Because this is how the world is supposed to be.'

'Are you supposed to be unhappy?'

'The world is supposed to have people.'

'Do people make you unhappy?'

'Sometimes.'

'Would you rather live in a world without people?'

'Of course not!'

'But if you live amongst things that make you unhappy, you must learn to be content being unhappy.'

'Maybe... I already am.'

Beep. He turned his head to the door. Beep. He stood up at and walked toward his room. He was not in the mood for company. Beep.

"Shinji, are you in there?"

"Asuka?" He called out, surprised.

"Yeah. I, uh..." she paused. "I lost my key." He could imagine her smiling nervously behind the door. A small smile unknowingly escaped his lips as he pictured it.

"I'll be right there." He was halfway to the door when it him: the gun. He quickly darted to his room and retrieved it. Then he dashed across the hall to his mother's room, and, after clicking the saftey on, tossed it in the back of the drawer and closed it. He then hurried back to the kitchen and unlocked the door. Asuka stared at him as he stood in front of her, panting.

"Have to hide your porn collection first?" She smiled.

"What? Of course not! I don't even have a porn collection," he said defensively.

"Uh huh, that's what they all say." She said sarcastically. "It's okay, I understand that guys have... needs. Even if they ARE completely ed needs." She smiled wider as she took off her shoes and walked past him. He opened his mouth to deny it again, but closed it without saying anything.

'I guess that's better than the real explanation, anyway,' he thought.

"So, what's there to eat around here?" Shinji turned around to see Asuka searching through his cupboards.

"You've been here so much that you don't even act like a guest anymore." He smiled at her.

"You have a problem with that?" She asked as she closed one door and opened another.

"Not at all." He walked over to join in her search. 'It's strange how just looking at her always makes me smile,' he thought to himself. He watched her as she stretched up to reach something. 'No, it's not strange at all.'

"You gonna stand there ogling me or are you going to help me out?" She'd now moved on to jumping to get whatever it was she was after. She felt something tap her on the shoulder and stopped jumping. She turned around as Shinji presented her with a footstool. "That's better." She took the stool from him and set it on the floor. As she bent down, something caught her attention. She turned her head toward the phone lying on the floor, with bits of drywall around the base and a frayed cord twisted around it.

"You have a gremlin problem?" Asuka asked sarcastically. "Or do I need to sign you up for anger management?" Shinji stared at her, confused. "The phone, stupid." She pointed to the mangled device a few feet away.

"Rei!" he cried suddenly. 'How could I have fogotten already?'

"Huh?" Asuka stood back up and turned to face him. The faint smiled disappeared from her lips. "Shinji..."

"Asuka, Rei's alive! She just called me a few minutes before you came. It sounded like she was in trouble." He grabbed her shoulders. "Asuka, we have to..." He paused as Asuka turned away. Tears were beginning to collect in her eyes.

"Shinji, you were just hearing voices again," her voice cracked slightly. "Misato said..."

"I know what Misato said!" A tear streamed out of her eye as she cringed at his sudden outburst. "She must have been lying. Rei's alive - I was just talking to her!"

"Stop it!" she cried. "Just stop it! It's hard enough without all of your dellusions!" She wrenched herself free of him and bolted out the door, slamming it behind her. Shinji hung his head.

"No matter what, I always make her cry. Maybe I should just stay away from her for a while." He stared at the floor as he spoke. "But... not chasing her would be the same as running away." He walked to the door and slipped on his shoes, then picked up Asuka's. He took a deep breath and slid the door open.

And there she was: standing just ahead of him - arms folded across the railing and staring up at the moon. "I didn't expect you to follow me," she said quietly. He began to slowly slide the door closed. "Wait." He froze. "I'm sorry, Shinji, I'm just burnt out," she sighed. "A lot's happened. Too much. It's not that I don't believe you, I..." She stopped as a hand rested on her shoulder. She smiled as she reached up and layed her hand on his. "If Rei's alive, we'll find her. And if she is, we'll find out why Misato lied." She wrapped her hand around his. "You know why I never mentioned anything about that night I kissed you? It's kind of silly, really," she chuckled. "I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to protect you like I wanted to. Plus, I didn't think you even remembered it. But, you don't need me to protect you. You need to learn to protect yourself first, you little wimp." She paused. "I love you, Shinji." His hand slid off her shoulder. She turned around to face him.

"You, uh... forgot your shoes," he said nervously as he held them up for her to see.

"You're such an idiot," she smiled as she stretched up and gave him a peck on the lips. She took her shoes from him and slipped them on. Shinji simply stood there, staring at her. She raised her eyes and gazed into his. "Are you gonna move?"

"Huh?" He raised an eyebrow.

"I'm still hungry, you know."

"Oh." He turned around and Asuka followed him back inside "Why don't you ever eat at your own house?"

"Because I can eat here," she smiled.

--------------------------

"It seems that he hasn't quite warmed up to you the way we had hoped, Captain Katsuragi - if that's even how you should be referred to."

"Yes. If the boy does not trust you, our plan will never work."

"Everything depends on it!"

"You worry too much. I'll have him eating out of my hand soon enough."

"You'd better start making some progress soon... or it will be someone else's turn to try."

"This committee does not tolerate failure!"

"R-right. You can count on me."

"Of course we can. Because you know what will happen if you cannot fulfill your duties."

"Yes, I understand."

"We will expect good news at our next meeting."

"Do not let us down again."

"Also, if you are able to locate the first child, we may show you a leniency for future shortcomings."

"Understood. Until then, gentlemen." 


End file.
